Two months after the death of his wife of 35 years Sam contacted me to communicate with her. Sam had taken care of his wife Laura through a lengthy illness and was her only caretaker 24/7. Thus he not only lost his wife he lost his job too.
Sam was grieving so deeply he even felt he could not go on without her as she had been his true soulmate. He was now adrift in his grief, was not working, leaving the house or having any interest in any aspect of the life in front of him … he was profoundly emotionally & spiritually lost.
Communicating with Laura and the messages she shared were helpful for Sam as was talking openly about my own experience with grief and loss to help him see he was not alone. No one is ever alone in this process and life does move on in time and that time is unique to each person.
I was deeply concerned about Sam and knew that the 6 & 12 month time periods after a loss were pivotal so I put a reminder in my calendar to reconnect and see how he was doing at both those times.
Six months from Laura’s death I reconnected with Sam. I was ecstatic when Sam wrote back that four months after Laura’s passing, purely by accident, he met a woman and made an instant connection with her. Since that time they have been inseparable and were starting a life together. In my world, and now in Sam’s, the synchronistic meeting was NOT an accident. Below are Sam’s exact words, shared with permission, of how and why he felt his broken heart healed.
“I was able to go from severe grieving for a 35 year marriage, that was perfect to finding a new love that has changed my life. The room we added before she died will help sell the house (so I can start a new home). It was like she did one last favor for me before she left. She was a wonderful wife and woman. I will never forget her. I will carry her in my heart forever.”
Sam’s heart will now carry two loves.
From profound disabling grief to a healed heart, a heart that can now allow new love to displace the grief, speaks to the resiliency of our hearts and our lives. Even when we are sure it will never happen, life finds a way.
-ET
Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.
